Conjunctions usually require commas to help the reader distinguish the different parts of a sentence. Here are some examples from Human Rights reports with the commas removed and the conjunctions in bold.
Part 1: Put in the missing commas.
Part 2: How can we break them up into more easily digested chunks? Sometimes changing the conjunction requiring two clauses to one can help. Try out this technique with the sentences below. Try to avoid sentences more than 1.5 lines long.
- While there is growing awareness of the human rights challenges that these new technologies can pose Quinn said the discussion should shift to focus on the specific challenges these new technologies pose to the rights of people with disabilities as provided by the Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities.
- The victim of an abusive relationship may also believe that having two parents in the household is better for the children despite the fact that they witness the unhealthy abuse.
Answer key
Part 1: Put in the missing commas
- While there is growing awareness of the human rights challenges that these new technologies can pose, Quinn said the discussion should shift to focus on the specific challenges these new technologies pose to the rights of people with disabilities, as provided by the Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities.
- The victim of an abusive relationship may also believe that having two parents in the household is better for the children, despite their witnessing the unhealthy abuse.
Part 2: Now rephrase to make clearer. Note the position of the commas now. (obviously, the following are merely suggestions)
- There is growing awareness that new technologies can pose human rights challenges. However, Quinn said the discussion should shift to focus on the specific challenges posed to the rights of people with disabilities. This is provided by the Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities.
- The victim of an abusive relationship may also believe that having two parents in the household is better for the children. But this situation entails witnessing the unhealthy abuse.
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Author: Carol Waites
Presentation/editing by Christina O’Shaughnessy
https://worldwidewriting.org/
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Carol Waites (PhD)
Email: carolswritingtips@gmail.com
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